When It Comes To Weight Loss - Language Matters

Since Thanksgiving is in six days for those of us in the United States, this week I’ll begin with a few things that I’m thankful for:

• My family - I’m married to my best friend and the mom of two pretty amazing teenage boys.

• My extended family - There are a lot of wonderful people in my extended family that I don’t see often but sure do love a whole lot.

• My home - Living in Southern California isn’t always blissful financially, but I prefer to focus on the weather and the close proximity to the beach on one side and the mountains on the other. Our actual house is cluttered and messy, but it’s also full of love, humor, and dog fur.

• My neighbors - The neighborhood we live in is exceptional, and the little village we’ve created is what I always dreamed of having when I was a kid living out in the boonies. I grew up in rural PA and absolutely LOVE my childhood home, don’t get me wrong…but it could get lonely living so far away from town and the cul-de-sacs where most of my friends lived and hung out together. 

• My work - It’s not been easy to start this business, but I’ve been led to this. The “knowing” that I talked about in my blog about Sedona? - This One Is About Sedona (Sort Of) That’s why I’m here, writing as much content as I can every day. I’ve figured out some important things that have created a lot of peace in my life around food, my body, and my mental health. What I want more than anything is to help others find that for themselves.

• My friends - I’m truly blessed to have an incredible support system and lots of love in my life, including those that read this. Thank you for your support…I appreciate you so much. 

I could go on for a long time with that list, but you get the idea.

When I talk about being thankful, I want to be very clear that I don’t encourage toxic positivity like “You have it so much better than everyone else so stop complaining about your weight, your depression, your (insert whatever else you are challenged by here).” 

That’s what we tend to say to ourselves when we’re going through our list, right?

I find that perspective unhelpful because it just heaps guilt on top of the struggle you’re already experiencing…which doesn’t *actually* put the focus on the positive, does it?

So instead I’d like to offer this: Can you think of your weight and mood fluctuations as fodder for more learning rather than a battle that has yet to be won?

Okay, please just hear me out. 

I spent years using language like:

“I’m so tired of fighting with my weight.”

“I’m so over this struggle with bulimia.”

“I can’t do anything about being depressed.”

“This is so difficult.”

“Why do I keep failing at this?”

How do you react to those sentences? Take a moment and notice how it feels in your body when you say those thoughts to yourself. 

Whether they resonate with you or not, they feel pretty awful.

Here’s how I felt when I said those things: Defeated. Hopeless. Like I should just accept my fate…that I won’t ever live in the body and mind that I really want or deserve.

And my body registered those thoughts quite effectively, making sure that I stayed that way.

Did you catch that?

Here’s the thing. Our bodies do what our thoughts tell them to do. So if your thoughts are always, “I’ll never be able to lose this weight and keep it off,” your body says, “You’re the boss!” and does exactly that.

It’s more complicated than that, but I’m trying to simplify it to make a point. By constantly referring to things as “hard,” “stressful,” “too busy,” “sucky”…that’s how they stay.

But how do I stop thinking that way when things are always so hard?!?! was my very first thought when I was introduced to this idea decades ago.

Practice. Seriously.

If you want to escape the misery inside your head, you have to practice the thoughts that will change the decor in there.

Metaphor time! Your mind is your home. It’s where you live. Do you want your home to be filled with things you enjoy, that light you up, that make you smile? Or do you prefer that your home has piles of garbage everywhere?

Maybe your actual home does have garbage everywhere because you’ve been struggling so much for so long. Well, that’s a pretty good reflection of your mind, isn’t it?

Good news! Working on micro-changes to your thoughts requires absolutely no physical effort or hiring a cleaning crew.

It does require a willingness to try something new. And if you’d like to stop feeling like shit and treating yourself like shit, then taking a look at the things you say to yourself is a good place to start.

Pay attention to the words you say and think. You might be surprised by what you hear.

Try this: Stop fighting against yourself and start forgiving yourself. You haven’t failed; you have more to learn.

When you start practicing “new hotness” thoughts (that’s Corrine Crabtree’s wonderful phrase), a shift begins. You will not notice it for a while. But then a few months later, you might notice that you smile at yourself in the mirror every now and then whereas before you scowled or looked away.

I can teach you the steps. My 12-Week Program doesn’t just cover the basics of weight loss in more detail (which you can find in my free guide, 5 Simple Ways to Revolutionize Your Weight Loss - email me at dana@revolution-within.com to get that right now), it also helps you figure out exactly what you need your mind to do to lose weight and manage your mood.

Your mind and your body are connected. You can’t change one without the other. And I’m here to guide you. For more information about my 12-week Program, “Best Year Ever 2024” which begins on January 1, 2024, email me at dana@revolution-within.com.

All will be well ✌🏼💙💜

Love & hugs, Dana