The Power of the Pause

What’s the first thing you do when you feel a strong urge to do something that you know isn’t good for you?

Do you get frustrated with yourself? Do you experience thoughts like, “This again? Haven’t I gotten past this yet?” Or “I’m so weak” or some other unnecessary insult?

I often ask about the things you tell yourself about yourself, because learning how to be kind to yourself is the entire basis of my program.

But today I’d like to take things in another direction.

Do you immediately give in to the urge? Or do you pause?

I’m going to be the champion of the pause today. Let’s start with an anecdote about my mom. When she was alive, she was very into giving advice. (And when I was younger, I was very into not taking her advice.)

However, this has always stuck with me and I still occasionally use a modified version of it to this day.

She told me that when I’m upset or angry at someone, that I should write down everything I want to say to that person and then wait three days before I send it.

Her sound logic behind this is that in three days’ time you won’t be as emotional about it as you were when you wrote it and you can either just not send it or revise it with less rage, panic, or despair involved.

Professionally I’m very good at implementing this. But in my personal relationships? Um…yeah, not so much.

Also, she told me this in the 90s. So three days in today’s concept of time is like, 12 hours.

But I’m getting offtrack.

The reason I bring this up is to talk about taking a pause before we react to things based solely on our emotions…emotional overeating, in particular.

And there’s a way to do this that’s pretty simple.

When you’re feeling an overwhelming urge to eat something when you’re not hungry, the first thing you can do (instead of heading straight to the pantry) is: 

1. Pause 

2. Set a timer for 3-5 minutes

3. Breathe in and out slowly

4. PAY ATTENTION to what you’re thinking and feeling

5. Bonus - write down what you hear in your head

There are a lot of uncomfortable feelings that will come up. Your breathing helps process the energy of that restlessness through your body while your mind is observing the things you say to yourself about yourself.

Sitting with those feelings and breathing through them isn’t a guarantee that you won’t head to the pantry after the timer goes off, but it’s a way to tune into your body and really stay present. 

This is just one way you can begin to change the pattern of giving into an urge.

Wanna know more? Then you should be on my email list! Send me a message at dana@revolution-within.com and we’ll get that going for ya.

Love & hugs,

Dana