Hellooooooo, beauties and cuties! ✨

After a three+ month hiatus, I’ve returned.

But if you’re new to my blog, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Dana Walker Inskeep, and I’m a Wellness & Mindset Coach who teaches people how to release their inner magic by being kind to themselves.

I didn’t start out this way. I spent the first several months of my coaching career as a weight loss coach. I wrote and taught a 12-week online course, worked with several one-on-one clients…I even set up my own website (where this blog lives).

After my 12-week course ended, things felt…off. 

I kept writing blogs about weight loss, but every time I posted one I thought to myself, “That’s not really about losing weight…it’s about learning how to change the way you think about yourself and the world around you.” 

Because it’s NEVER about the weight…it’s ALWAYS about how you feel about yourself.

So the title of “Weight Loss Coach” didn’t feel right to me.

Extra weight is almost always a symptom of some greater dissatisfaction. We tend to overeat because we’re numbing out. We have big feelings that are scary and, rather than actually being curious about the feelings and how to process them, we turn to something soothing. 

Food can sure hit the spot when we’re feeling terrible. But overindulging usually ends up making us feel even worse than we did before.

Even if we manage to white-knuckle our way through changing habits for a few months, those changes won’t stick if we’re still defaulting to bullying ourselves.

Without doing some significant emotional work, the bad habits will eventually come back.

Because it’s NEVER about the weight…it’s ALWAYS about how you feel about yourself.

So I stepped back for a few months and dove into my confusion through the techniques I teach in my coaching practice. (I’ll go deeper into this in future posts.)

What were the results? I’m so glad you asked!

Well...I hit a weeks-long depression spiral. I felt like a failure at coaching. Like nothing I taught helped anybody. 

At first.

But then…I felt a shift. A big one. (This is EXACTLY why you need to keep doing the emotional work.)

It went something like this:

Practice. Practice. Awareness. Frustration. A little bit of progress. 

Overwhelm. Patience. Setback. Anxiety. Worryfearworryworry 

MELTDOWN

More awareness. Persistence. Practice. Doubt. More awareness. 

Practice. Patience. Persistence.

💫🌟💫

—> Emotional Growth Level Achieved <—-

💫🌟💫

You see, as an empath I feel feelings really deeply. Like, my emotional pain feels so much worse than physical pain. That’s why I have a history of self-harm. It’s less painful to run until I drop, to chew my cuticles off, to binge and purge than it is to feel my emotions.

Maybe you can relate. (And if you’d like to read more about that, here’s a link to my past blog post about my eating disorder struggle: https://www.revolution-within.com/blog/lets-talk-about-what-no-one-will-talk-aboutbulimia)

Here’s the thing: When you do the work? It gradually stops being that way.

Also…nowhere in that word sequence do you see the word PERFECT.

That’s where kindness steps in.

In order to get to the place of detachment where your emotions don’t completely run the show, you have to learn how to be kind to yourself.

You have to find the things within yourself that you’ve been hiding from. You have to pull them out and look at them and feel the feelings around them.

Whatever those feelings are, I’m betting Anger is at the top of the list. Then Shame. Then Judgment. 

I’m capitalizing those words because they are REALLY F*CKING IMPORTANT.

Those are the feelings that keep us from really changing our lives and getting what we want out of them.

We hold on to suppressed emotions, and that energy stays in our bodies, and it keeps us from being as healthy as we can be.

And of course, once you deal with those emotions and achieve one level, the next one begins. 

Of course it does.

But I don’t mean that in a “OF COURSE IT DOES BECAUSE EVERYTHING SUCKS” kind of way. I mean it in a “Life isn’t meant to be blissful and easygoing and carefree 24/7…we’re supposed to learn from the sh*tty things and grow from them” way.

Because the journey is lifelong. There’s no finish line. (Well, besides the inevitable one. But that’s not my focus here.)

I’m telling you…going the distance while cutting yourself some f*cking slack and allowing yourself to be a mistake-making human - just like everyone else - makes that journey a lot more peaceful.

Best part of all of this is: Now that I’ve reached this level, it’s become easier to leave emotionally draining situations behind. 

That’s something that historically has been really difficult for me to do, because when I care about someone I want to do everything in my power to help them heal. 

The previous version of me, even when I knew better, would cling to one-sided friendships because “Everyone deserves a friend who isn’t toxic!”

But a couple of months ago I cut someone loose whose energy was draining me to the core. The old me would’ve continued denying that fact and stuck around forever.

Full truth? It was really difficult, and I still miss him. 

I’m really proud of myself, though, because it’s finally sunk into my overly-giving, boundary-violating consciousness that no matter how many lifeboats I send, I can’t save someone who’s determined to drown.

So, reluctantly, I’ve released it. And that feels absof*ckinglutely LIBERATING.

This new level of self-kindness is one I’ve not experienced before. I’ve created a sense of calm and self-trust within myself that I’ve been working on manifesting for a long time.

It’s even more proof that holding space for uncomfortable feelings - not forcing them in one direction or another, but allowing yourself to experience them with a reminder that they’re temporary (everything is) - and not shaming or judging yourself for having BIG EMOTIONS is really effective.

That’s what I have for you this week. Thanks for reading, and remember…all will be well.

Love & hugs,

Dana